Thanks Giving

I'm a fairly polite guy. Really. I'll say thank you to the same waiter who's been serving me for every service they perform, from bringing my meal to taking away the empty plate when i'm done devouring the rather delicious lasagna. Regardless whether or not the said waiter had been a complete turd or a darling, i'll say the thank yous. I credit my thanks giving nature to my family who'll smack me silly if i don't do so.

I know there are some of you who're like me(Hie there fellow nice person) and there are those who are completely oblivious to the power of it. Sure, you don't have to mean it ALL THE TIME, but just saying it sometimes can turn an unpleasant encounter with the durian seller from turning into a thorny affair. Pun quite the intended.

It just so happens that I am surrounded by these people. I blame their backgrounds and upbringing because if they'd had been brought the way i did, then i wouldn't have a topic to blog about. Or bitch. A good friend whom i shall refer to as Dark Stick, said rather succinctly, "Friends don't need to say thanks to friends". Ya meh? Shouldn't we as friends be the ones dishing out the thanks to each other like nobody's business?

Friends call me "hak hei", something like being too thankful and gracious. I got me a friggin' label for being too gracious? Bloody china-people.

It's like not saying "Please" too. YOu want to borrow something from me the least you can do is say please instead of "Gimme now la" or the evergreen classic that is "Bollow me yor stuffs". Fucken china-people.

I tried being like them, just to see what's it like being impolite. I became the non thank you and please saying dude for awhile. I actually itched every time i didn't say either one. "Bah, screw them la", i told myself that. I'd rather be known as the guy who says thanks to everything than be the guy who's a complete asshole.

Politeness isn't part of the package that comes when you're born, it is something you learn.

Chris signing off...

You know English ah?

I am a Banana. No, not the sexual connotation version of it and certainly not from the appalling song by Gwen Stefani but rather, i'm a Chinese dude who can't speak the language. I know most of the foul words(thanks guys!) and i know enough to order char kuey teow and not wanting the icky cockles. More than that, i can grasp words here and there. I was brought up by Yankee and British tv. I read Enid Blyton with a passion. I even developed an American accent from watching Sesame Street and comedies so much so that people thought i was actually from America.

Since i grew up at a place where people who don't know the area at all and who tend to think that its somewhere in between there and nowhere, my command of the national language far surpassed that of my mother tongue. Heck, the biggest praise i got was from the "apam balik" couple who said i sounded exactly like a Malay. With very slitty eyes.

Back in the days of my innocence, i was afraid to go to any Chinese restaurants for fear of being chased out because i certainly would've mispronounced crab (for those who don't know, crab in Chinese is very similar to a certain part of the female anatomy. And it ain't the armpits). There were some nice people who talked to me in either Malay or English but there were also those who gave me dirty looks because of my inability to converse with them in Chinese. When i say, "Can i have the breast part?", they'll pull a blank face ala zombie nation but when i Chinafy the sentence, "Gimme da blest plat ya.Duwan da buntut", voila!

When i was younger, i used to feel stupid for not being able to understand the language. I've even blamed my parents right in front of them. But as i got older, i told myself, "So What?". I'm certainly not the only one who can't speak Chinese. So now, i no more dread going to chinese shops and restaurants. I'll try my best to order but if i can't then i'll switch to English and if worse transcends to worst, Malay. I'll even do sign language. Not even the language barrier is going to stop me from ordering chicken rice.

I remember a time when i used to like this Chinese girl. She was nice, pretty, sweet and i suspect that she liked me too. However, i realised that not only will the language hinder communication greatly but also the way of thinking is just not compatible. She likes Jay Chou. I like Judas Priest. I want to watch Hotel Rwanda(great movie by the way), she wants to watch God of Cookery 3. I'd rather headbang my head off for her than serenade her the latest ballad. I'm not saying that i won't ever get together with a Chinese educated girl but the fact of the matter is that without even the basics, how the hell am i going to tell her that i love her?

I'm not going to blame my parents any more especially my dad, who is the main culprit actually, for not teaching me and my sisters Chinese as we were growing up. It's not too late for me to pick up the language anyway. In fact, i've noticed that there are more and more bananas now. And most of them are girls. Pretty ones too. Thank You, God.

Guess what guys? It's back which means that I'M BACK.

Hello and welcome back to the world of Whacker Inc. Or just plain me, Chris. It's been like ages since i've updated this blog of mine but the truth is simply that i got bored of the whole blogging thing. I got bored updating. I got bored trying to come up with posts that have meaning and a message to present as opposed to my previous posts where they were just absolute crap.

I however got back into the blogging fiasco via Friendster's blog service which at first was enjoyable, got pretty frustrating in the end. It's slow, unreliable and plain sucky. So i hope you guys come back often and check my blog since i assure you all, i'll be updating it pretty often from now on. Topics will range from my rather eccentric life to views and thoughts i feel strongly about.

Until then, take care and thanks for reading. Chris, signing off...

The lack of updates is due to the fact...

...that updating blogs is rather gayish in nature and very much a girly thing to do too.

A really unfortunate series indeed..

The end of my torturous wait for college is drawing near. It's been quite a sickening wait, what with life and fate dishing out shitty things at me to face day after freaking day. Or is this God's complex chess game with me as the King that will eventually conquer my fears and enemies? Is he the referee in which my movements are forever scrutinized by Him and that if i make a bad move, a punishment is sent down to smite me?

Hmm..

Those who know, please pray for my speedy recovery and those that don't, start praying anyway. The story goes like this:

My back started to show signs of pain about a month after the 3rd semester of college after a workout session that turned out pretty good at first but with consequences i never imagine would happen again. At first i just shrugged it off, thinking it was just me having some slight soreness here and there..then it kept getting worse until to the point where i couldn't even think about thinking. So i decided to pop some pills to kill the pain. It worked. In the beginning though. Then it got ineffective as the days rolled on. I needed something stronger. So i thought i'll just in more pills instead!!! Bad idea it was for the unexpected mutha of all unexpectedness came... my left leg started to be numb. I could at first wriggle my toes but after a while, my whole leg became powerless. I can't use stairs as it is an exercise in excrutiating pain.

But every storm cloud will revert back into a normal cloud(crappy analogy i know). Just last week i went to a Chinese Medical Aid centre and did acupuncture and some massaging. And let me tell you, it's been a long time since i've felt quite good and confident as well. So far so good as i am still walking like tortoise albeit a tortoise on crack(which means i'm slightly faster la). So it is with hope that i will be up and running in a few more weeks. I can't wait for that moment to arrive.

SO i hope all you guys and gals out there PLEASE take care of yourselves. Do not get hurt and suffer. Have a great week people!!

Chris signing off...

Hello again!

How is everyone doing? I hope you're all fine since I believe this year is going to be a great one even though it started off pretty fucken shitty for me. Hehehe. Whatever it is, I am looking forward to what surprises and shit 2005 is ready to throw at me.

Bring it on....

Cheers for now!

Happy New Year everyone!...

(my first non cryptic title too!)

What a year it has been this 2004. Here's a very fast summary of what happenend to me in this year:

First 3 months: Became an ex bf. Was a wreck for awhile. Parents didn't trust me. College life sucked. Contemplated suicide....... KIDDING!!!

Next 3,4 months or so: Life started picking itself up again. Was in peak physical shape. Could workout for hours even! Gained back parents' trust, which was good. College life was brighter and more fun. Then it happened; cracks in the brotherhood were showing...and i was the one doing the cracking......

Last 3 months: Were the best 3 months of my life. New friendships were forged.College life was at its peak and funnily enough this was the also the worst showing in terms of projects and assignments;absolutely abysmal. Hurt my back again. Haven't worked out in almost 3 months. I have a tummy. A rather bulging one too. Damnit.

I truly believe that i am more grown up now. Heck, more matured even. (Hmm, are those two the same?) Bugger that. I hope that 2005 will bring me more happy memories. To all, have a great new year! See you soon!

R.I.P Dimebag Darrell

I may not be the biggest fan of Pantera nor am i even a supporter Damageplan but i respected and liked his works. To be murdered right in front of so many people while doing the thing that you love the most, that's just sickening as hell. I feel really sad now, not only as a fan but also as a human being. No one deserves to such a pointless death.

Here's a big \m/ to you man, your music shall be blasted forever.

Over the hills and far away...

Under better circumstances, this entry would have been killer. It would contain anecdotes that would have cracked you up so badly, you'd be more cracked than crack.

But i'm afraid it's not to be for i am still extremely busy, exams are around the corner, hell, I even have carolling practise to attend to.

All and all, i wish everyone all the best in their exams and in their lives as well. Good luck y'all!

A new and improved me. Can it be true?

Oh my lordy, I tell you, the last month or so have been the busiest, the most hectic, the most headache inducing, the most of the most i'll ever be. Doesn't make sense? I know for i am a free man. Make that sort of free. No more rushing for work, just one more project to go and like 5 tests and lastly, my exams and then only i'll be a free man!

The last few weeks have seen a marked change in me: physically,mentally and spiritually. I'll do a breakdown for each:

Physically - I think i've put on some weight due to me not working out. Every time i lift a dumbbell i'll think to myself,"end of tag

" and other various work related shit. All hail tummy!

Mentally - I believe that my stance on certains things have been altered or changed completely. I've made friends with people i thought i'd never talk to in the first place, changed my perceptions on a lot of issues regarding what friendship really is and how important it is to maintain them.

Spiritually - Metal is more than music. It's a religion. *what did you think i was going to say?*

Besides that, i'm the sort of unofficial "Dude to Tease til Kingdom Come". Seriously, i've never been teased or humbled like this ever. Not by a guy but by a girl. Make that 3 girls. Luckily i'm a tough guy.

I think.
All in all,

Iron(y) is good for you it seems...

I was approached by a classmate whom i've never even made eye contact for more than 2 seconds let alone talked with, came up to me all of a sudden and said....

Classmate: You're Christopher right?
Benevolent Me: Yes.
Classmate: Oh, ok. Have you done your Professional Development project?
Benevolent Me: Yes.
Classmate: Oh, so can you give me your project.
Benevolent Me: FUCK OFF YOU STINKING LIL LAZY SHIT CAKE OF A HUMAN BEING!!!

Ok, so i never ACTUALLY said that. So i told him, i'll help you but i ain't giving you my goddamn project which i spent like a month doing and still am. The irony is that the project is mainly about ETHICS.

Well on to a more 'happy' note, the next 12 days are going to be absolute HELL. Projects are due like milk from a leaking cow and my mind is slowing contemplating shutting down.

If only someone could shave my poodle and i'll be a happy boy...

I love red bean possum buns

You know the feeling that you get when you don't fulfill something that's bugging the heck out of you? It's a constant nag, an itch that you can't seem to scratch it off and once you find the answer, you'll be relieved. That's what happened to me yesterday. I did the best U-turn ever in my life. I went and U-turned back to college. Really am glad i did that as the reward was a stomach ache and a sore mouth all caused by laughter. Laughter that if collected, could power up the whole goddamn country yo!!!

Exaggerations aside, this has been an eventful week. Had to rush up a whole lotta shit. I actually did something i thought impossible; I DID CODING. I admit, i'm a total loss when it comes to programming but something happened, i understood. And that was it, the catalyst of my programming might. Oh joy. But i still can't create websites using even Frontpage to save a portion of my cute and pert bum. Oh well...

Ever get the feeling that you're being watched? If yes, then how about the feeling then you're being checked out instead? It's like that itch, only with more malevolent connotations attached.

Man, i soooooooo love the feeling.

A tow truck that's towing a tow truck is so...

.....ironic. What did you think i was going to say?

Life's like that i guess. When you think you're on a path of glory, along comes a ginormous(yes,it is a word) hole that swallows you whole. What was once a bright sunny day is now just pure darkness. Oh well, realization is a bitch.

It hit me like a ten ton hammer. But i'm not that disappointed, truth be told. I sort of expected it. The inability to communicate with another properly was the biggest hurdle and so was compatibility. No regrets though. I managed to get that buzz again, the buzz that there's some thing going between the two of you, the buzz that makes one go all tingly inside and all cuddly wuddly and...oh my...mushy moment alert!...Arghhhhhhh! Must stop! Must cleanse myself!

MUST LISTEN TO THE CROWN!

If only i had a tow truck...

Is it safe for me to run with scissors?

I've always liked that line. Normally when i hear people saying that, i picture this really pudgy kid in my head, running like a lightning bolt with his terrified AND very pissed mom chasing after him. Then the mom catches him and then proceeds to spank the little devil's behind into high heaven. Ah, sounds just about right...

Oh well, that's my (morbid) thought of the day.

Oh my does time really fly. It's like this, time flies fastest when:

1.You are having fun(ie getting drunk just by smelling a can of beer, hanging out with friends until the wee hours,doing *wink wink* things).

2.When you're bored (ie whole day just rotting and waiting for dinner).

3.When you have a bajillion work to do(ie no examples needed since this is really self-explanatory(i hope so)).

All in all, i'm 'suffering' from all three. It's not that bad but when you think about it, it's pretty scary. Just like The Ring, now THAT'S a creepy movie.

Gimme your best shot. I'm ready.

This has been the fastest week ever. No joke. It went by so fast, i can't even remember what i did yesterday! Well, i KNOW i didn't leave my car keys in the car again...

As it is, i have exactly one bloody month to complete 4 projects. While 4 may look little but the work involved, is well, let me put it gently, is TREMENDOUSLY THE SUCKY MANY. I have tonnes of research to do, organizing my groups so that each member has something to do and remembering the respective deadlines for each project.

Don't you ever question yourself why is it that you can think about something or someone so much that it doesn't give you a migraine at all but if you think about but your mind and soul screams MURDER! cos you're taking 10 minutes too long over the colour of your underwear.

Now if you would kindly excuse me, i have someone to think about...

Of trapped keys and crappy tests...

Oh my, what a day. "You have to send your sisters to the LRT station!!!" were the words that woke me up today instead of the sound of my watch's alarm.

That however, was to be the start of my worst Monday ever...

Another catastrophe that happened next was in the form of spilled petrol on my hand. Not a nice smell. Felt like puking. And i needed to pee very badly.

I then rushed home; took my bath like the buffalo i was and ate my breakfast like i've never eaten anything for the past week. And my hair wasn't properly prepped too. Drove to my friend's place without giving a damn about the other people and promptly reached there 15 minutes late.

Then it happened... The catalyst of every major shitache for me... I locked my car. Without taking out my keys... And to add to my already miserable state, a dog decided that trees aren't the 'in' thing anymore when it comes to leaving his scent, so my tyre was deemed the most suitable replacement. I hate dogs.

To cut a long story short, my dad came with the spare so a sigh relief i breathed. But fate decided to deal me another shitcake, this time by making me do incredulously inane things like poking a twig into the key-hole. The twig broke. I can't open my door... More on this later...

Had a mock test today. I didn't do much revision. So there i was, sitting in between two buds of mine, smiling at each other like zombified cabbages because we knew nuts. It was hilarious, some tried surreptitiously to cheat by looking at their notes and look into space if the lecturer passes by but even short-sighted yobs would have guessed what they were actually doing. I love the subject and of course, the lovely and well-endowed nerd of a lecturer .

Then went back home, took a different road, friend had a minor car accident and i managed to shove that twig down to hell and finally i drove back home sweating like a pig on a roaster!!! Yay for me everyone!!!

This has been a very long post and my fingers need rest. So take care everyone and if you ever see a dog come near your car, kick the crap out of it....

I didn't get to play with any lanterns this year :(

I've come to the conclusion that green tea flavoured mooncakes will take the world by storm. The taste is so good, you feel like gorging on them at first sight.

Delicious.

It's the 1st day of October today and boy does it feel ever so frightening. This is because deadlines for project submissions are just looming around the corner. I can't stress enough the fact that we have to push ourselves in order to finish up the projects ASAP. Ideas flow like a river whenever we have meetings but output usually end up as trickles. Not good at all this is.

It's funny that when you're online and using some IM program to chat with someone you know in real life, that once you see them in person you end up not saying a word but instead give out million dollar smiles. What's so difficult about asking each other,"How was your day?","Why do you have mustard on your ears?",etc but when you're using a keyboard you sound like a regular Casanova. Communication is vital in any human relationship, i really do believe that. So why the bloody hell can't i say anything more than "Hello" to her?

Life's a big ball of misery when you choose to be miserable...

What goes up,must come down.Crashing like a comet...

Wow.Just when you thought you're on top of your game,along comes shit to bring you down to earth.My presentations are legendary(hehehe),always eliciting insane laughter from the crowd,lecturers included.But it only takes a single mistake,a tiny slip in judgement and BAM!You're mauled by lions. Lions within yourself that is. For that happened to me today.

Honestly,the praises i get from my friends telling me that they enjoyed my presentation,i tend to play it down.I make myself as modest as possible because that's what i really feel.I know i'm able to pull off cock and bull crap when it comes to points i have no clue whatsoever but today was an eye opener,both for me and my friends.

For the first ever i was lost for words.My brain frozed.All eyes were upon me,amazed that i could actually screw up in what it seems is my speciality.Never will i underestimate presentations ever again.I was ashamed of myself.Thankfully i managed to redeem myself when one of my friends asked a question and i answered it pretty well,in fact,it was of my normal standards.Ceh wah....hehehehe......

This coming Friday yields another presentation and this time i will nail it.I will nail it so hard even Thor's Hammer can't take it out. :)

Wish me luck people and keep bringing on the compliments....

mmmm....red bean mooncakes...mmm...

Wow.The week really flew by me like a bullet train in Japan.I've finished one assigment so far and it feels great.Which is also timely because another assignment,a killer in the making,has just been dumped on my lap to be accomplished by November.

Damnit,i so love my course.

I've gotten my second semester results and i'm pleased to say that not only have i passed all but also with rather colourful grades attached as well.What makes it sweeter is the fact that i thought i was going to fail at least 1 subject and do tremendously terrible in another.

While i celebrated my surprising yet pleasant success,my good buds who didn't as well were contemplating whether or not to shout at the top of their lungs or simply,die.I feel bad.But at the same time,in some sick way,glad that they did fail.I really hope that this will only make them realize that doing things last minute and not giving a care about their studies has to stop.NOW.

With that said,i'm going to treat a certain someone a packet of M&M's....