Tuesday, 28 February 2006

I like reality shows because they're sooo real

So-called reality shows either irk me to no end or leave me in total suspense. I wouldn’t say I’m a supporter, but rather a person curious to see what people are really capable of. And since I am unemployed and I have the TV all to myself, I’ve been watching quite a number of these shows lately. And from my observation, I can sum up the traits or the necessary ingredients of a reality show into these:

• A host that is both friendly and frank and supportive of the contestants. And they MUST to look hot.

• Every reality show MUST have the well-liked or all-rounder good guy/gal that appeals to both genders. This person will then be cheered on and even if he/she makes a boo boo, they’ll be forgiven in an instant because they’re so darn nice.

• Every reality show MUST have its she-bitch and he-bitch that will appeal (or in many cases, disgust) to both genders. These people will also have a proclivity toward being overly egotistical and they think they’re right all the time. For them to eat humble pie is like trying to reduce the gas in Pepsi.

So far, I find myself enjoying America’s Next Top Model mainly because of the very beautiful and terrifically babelicious, Tyra Banks. Sure she keeps saying the same things over and over again and her expressions are one-dimensional but damn the woman looks good. But the main attraction is of course, the would-be models. Some of them are so dumb it makes me miserable. Even the non-blondes are dumber. I’ve slapped my forehead in frustration so many times just by watching this bloody show. And those effeminate men can really bitch eh?

Next up is a mix bag of some of the shows I’ve watched. Project Runway is farking boring and it’s just one of those shows where I’ll watch for 5 minutes and I’ll turn off the telly and then proceed to bash my head against the wall. Made to Order is one of my favourites. It’s not really a reality show in the sense of it but it is realer than most. Seeing that dude with the funky hairdo create some of the most aesthetically pleasing foods is simply amazing. We all know who won Rockstar: INXS but watching the re-runs of it still makes me jump and yell at some of the performances. Dave Navarro I have to say is the prettiest man I’ve ever laid eyes on. Also it has made me more aware of the roots of rock music. And by the way, I can’t wait for Marty to release his own album. I want to hear “Trees” damnit!

And since this is a blog about bitching and ranting, I’m going to focus my attention on the cream of the crappytastic crop. Not long ago, one of the local TV stations came up with a show called Malaysia’s Most Beladyful. Oops, I meant Malaysia’s Most Beautiful. The concept was this; after choosing women who represent the following type: egotistical, bitchy and whiny bout every thing, angelic, voluptuous, dumb, arrogant, adorable… they will then have to go through tests, obstacles, period and other whatevers, and then finally be crowned The Most Beladyful. Sorry! Beautiful, damn. Its premise while on paper sounds interesting, just exposed the ugly side to some of the participants. And I hear there’s another season coming. Oh my.

With the proliferation of more reality shows, it makes me wonder, what will come out next? Malaysia’s Best Farmer? The Rotiman Cometh? Project Pasar Malam? What is the world coming to?

I guess I have to tune in next week.

Chris is signing off, for now…

PS: The new season of Yankee Idol is not that all exciting. Simon should really lay off the tight tops. Protruding man nipples are gross. The girls are much nicer to look at though. Yay!

Friday, 17 February 2006

Ah, Valentine’s Day. What more can I say?*

* = Quite a lot actually.

So how did last February 14th go for you? I hope it went well. Mine certainly did. I managed to sell off some of my CDs and I had a great dinner with my family. So what’s so great? The fact that it had no meaning to me whatsoever either than me spending it with my family. I had no date. I’m still single and so loving it. Whee!

All right, I’m going to be all slightly Scroogy but I’ll tell you this, Valentine’s Day is just another day of my life. I didn’t shit heart shaped turds. I wasn’t serenaded by a fat, moustached and violin wielding Italian while I ate my chicken chop for lunch. I didn’t get any mysterious calls or smses from equally mysterious strangers. The last time I ever had Valentine’s as a day to remember and to a certain extent, a reason for celebrating it, was with this girl who I couldn’t see often let alone go on dates with. But I remember it being special because someone actually liked me enough and decided that, well, loving this bloke was worth it.

To me Valentine’s is the day where couples celebrate their love for each other on a more visible and grandeur way. For the singletons, it’s just another day. It’s gone completely berserk with everyone wanting a piece of the heart shaped money bag. Think about this: your partner will make you pay for not remembering it. How could you? Valentine’s is so commercialized that even Lillian Too (the horribly dyed hair lady and together with her daughter who has equally has horribly dyed hair.) has come up with heart shaped jades the size of small hills to enhance the energy of that special room of your house. Hint of its benefits: wink wink. Ah ha, ah ha.

There’s no way in hell I would spend 300 bucks on roses that will die the next day. I’d rather take that money and invest it in property. Call me anything you want, but I’ll call myself pragmatic.

And as cliché as it sounds, to me, every day is a cause to celebrate my love for my partner and I don’t need no one to remind me.

It’s also much cheaper to do so. He he.

Chris is signing off, for now…

PS: CSI is back! Yay! And Lost is coming soon too! Whee! (Completely unrelated but what the heck, it’s my blog. :))

Monday, 6 February 2006

To move forward, is to not look back

Surely by looking back, you might feel a sense of intense trepidation. You’ve always thought you’d leave the roost once you’re old enough. Once you’re stable and secure. But that normally happens in the movies. What really happens is that you don’t know what’s in store for you. You might feel that you might not make it when the time comes for you to jump. You’ve an anchor tied to your legs, keeping you firmly where you are. But then one day you’re thrust a knife. You see an island of hope and freedom but at the same time you rub eyes, thinking whether it is an illusion or not. But deep down inside of you, you know that it’s much better than being tied still. You have to grow. You have to prove to yourself that you can be better than you already are.

So you take the knife, you cut the rope that holds the anchor. For a while you think, maybe I’ve should’ve waited. Maybe what I’m doing now will lead me to my downfall. But not cutting the rope when you had the chance is like taking the knife and stabbing yourself in the back.

Chris is signing off, for now…

PS: Did you know that you could get yourself a fridge, a washing machine and a television for only RM1900?