Thursday 29 September 2005

Hypermarket Madness

Carrefour. Tesco. Giant. They're everyfrickin'where. What do these hypermarkets have in common besides funky names(Giant however sounds like a really cheap Kedai Runcit)? They're jam-packed with people from all walks of life wanting the best deal for a bar of soap. These places are also the best way to see how Malaysians are really like. The best way to describe a certain kind of hypermarketeer is simply to break them into groups as such:

Average (Joe,Jane,Mat,Siti,Muthu,Kumari,Lai Lai,Ah Fatt)
The most common of the lot. Anything and everything average applies to them; the time they take to decide which detergent they want, time it takes for them to pay, time for them to put the goods into the car... Well, you get the picture.

The Jostler
The most violent of the lot. They'll barrel their way thru the crowd like a mad bull whose behind has been poked with a hot poker. Before you can grab that last packet of Maggi Mee they'll push you aside, they'll chuck the loot into their trolley and continue on their war path. And they're the most likely to cut lines especially during peak period. Best avoided at all costs unless you want battle scars.

The Deranged Trolley Pusher
Trolleys are like cars. You have to steer them, manouver them properly around people. If it weren't for the din that it creates, the trolley in the hands of this nutter is a lethal weapon.

The Scrutinizer
This hypermarketeer doesn't actually directly annoy or irritate you in any form but sometimes you wonder, just take the damn toilet paper already!

The Bulbous Monstrosity
No matter how you try to manouver yourself, you still end up being flattened because you've been squeezed silly by this shopper just when you saw that tiny gap and you thought you could get pass.

I on other hand am a Take 'N' Go Pay hypermarketeer. I take what's needed and i pay the amount due and i'll get the hell out from the place.

So what hypermarketeer are you?

Chris signing off...

PS: Jaya Jusco's supermarket rocks cos of Siti Nurhaliza. She nice.

10 comments:

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Anonymous said...

to the anonymous guy above me, please do not post advertisements in my frens blog(chris)...this is a blog not the yellow pages for you to advertise what ever it is ur selling...CHRIS accepts comments not advertisements..so dont take up space...do it somewhere else!!

Syar said...

azrie, the anonymous guy is probably a spam bot. so no use telling it off. word verification chris, its the only way.

I live in hypermarket central : shah alam. Tesco to the south, Giant to the north, Makro to the east and Carrefour to the west. SURROUNDED. everything oso, must go Tesco/Giant/Makro. (carrefour's in subang, but its still close) And Giant dares calls itself a mall. sure, it has MPH, guardian and a place that sells jeans and CDs. but a hypermarket is a hypermarket is a hypermarket.

I'm the stay-the-hell-away type of hypermarketer. I have an allergic reaction everytime I step into one of those places.

btw, thanks for linking me!!

Chris said...

Azrie: Thanks man. He's running for dear life now.

Syar: I've linked you for quite awhile already but you're welcome all the same. And it is noted that if i see you in a hypermarket, i'll run for dear life.

Swift said...

i'm the same kind... take watever u wan, pay and ciao! unless i'm on a financial crisis or something onli i will scrutinize the products ;)

Mawar said...

hmmm... i think i am the clenches-fists-and-determinely-steps-in-to-get-ONLY-and-we're-talking-ONLY-those-three-things-mum-sent-me-there-for-and-walk-out-but-oooooh-look-it's-m&ms-at-10%-off-and-buy-one-free-one-ribena-oh-and-shiny-packaging-too-oooh-must-buy type of hypermarketeer.

Syar said...

it deleted my entire comment. it deleted the WHOLE thing. *&^%$ Blogger.

anyhow...M : isn't that your approach to pretty much everything in life? ;-)

and Chris : Don't run! Say hi, I'm ALWAYS nice to people I know (or pseudo-know-through-other-people-know) wherever I am. ALWAYS. ask anyone. :-)

Chris said...

Swift - You and i share the same quirks and foibles. It's scary. Very.

Mawar - You're one bad ass hypermarketeer.

Syar - Duly noted. I WILL say Hi. If i can recognize you though.

Swift said...

ohlala... we can be gay! just joking...

Mawar said...

syar jahat!!!