Love at first BLAH

I remember the first time I ever laid eyes on her. It was just after I had moved out and after saving my money for a future that came earlier than expected I decided that a little soul searching would do me good. So there I was, walking silently and minding my own business when all of a sudden, I stopped outside a brightly lit shop. She was there, like she was expecting me. I couldn’t believe my own eyes. I went nearer.

Her body was encased in the finest black gown. Her face was clear and animated. Her voice was a perfect sonata. It was after all, love at first sight.

For she is my iPOD nano.

To me, the saying “Love at first sight” is something I’ve never actually experienced though there have been times where it has come real close. Like for example, the first time ever I stepped into a real metal shop. No offence to the auntie’s shop at Campbell Complex but this shop here in Singapore was of the highest order. Seeing so many metal CDs almost brought tears to my eyes. Or like the time when I saw a real Ferrari Enzo here in Malaysia Admittedly, I was never a fan of the car. I thought it was too birdy looking. Then when I saw it, I was immediately mesmerized. I was speechless. I even touched it but just a little for fear of scratching it with my short fingernails. And then when the owner powered its engine, the unmistakeable roar resonated in the sky. Now every time I see or hear a tricked out car, I chuckle softly knowing that I’ve witnessed one of the best cars ever in the history of humankind.

But when it comes to applying that saying to people, I have yet to know its true meaning. What I thought was ‘Love at first sight’ was actually ‘Like at first sight’ or the slightly embarrassing, ‘Lust at first sight’. This is especially true when it comes to my encounters with girls. More often than not, I seem to have a knack for saying some of the stupidest and inane things ever to be unleashed unto unsuspecting females. In my mind, I think what I am saying is always witty and smart and that girls would think that, “Hey, this guy’s pretty cool.” But their facial expressions tell me that I should’ve kept my mouth shut and instead go find a cure for ‘putting the foot in the mouth’ syndrome.

Shit.

There comes a time when 9 out of 10 times you’ll most likely to meet people you’ll probably forget you knew existed in mere seconds. But like lightning on a clear, blue sky there’ll be this one person who you meet for the first time and go, “Wow.” It is in this kind of situation that I truly am hopeless and afraid of. Besides feeling absolutely gob smacked, my brain will be scrambling to find the words and when I do my mouth will naturally spew out the wrong ones.

So after many, many (highly embarrassing) attempts at trying to be a suave and smooth Casanova, I’m leaving all my hopes on Fate. While Fate has undoubtedly been rather hard on me the last few times, I’m hoping that now I’ll have Lady Luck by my side.

After all, with so many ‘ladies’ behind my back, what could go wrong eh?

Chris is signing off. For now…

PS: I miss having intelligent conversations with pretty girls who (eerily) have the same likes as me.